Expelled Star gives up on modern living

Journal of Imaginary Sciences, Vol 20, 2009

Expelled Star gives up on modern living

Today, Ben Stein announced he was giving up his lifestyle as an actor and economist as he w\as about to go back to nature.

The star of Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed, announced that due to the reliance on evil science in the modern world, he was going to return to nature in order to avoid the comforting evil brought on by modern Godless, science.

The star explained that this derived from a comment he once made, in which he stated that:

"Love of God and compassion and empathy leads you to a very glorious place, and science leads you to killing people."

Someone, he said, pointed out that all modern technology was brought on by science. He then decided that this meant he must renounce technology and live in the woods like the animals. He then proceeded to tear his clothes off and run stark naked into the woods behind the press conference centre.

Several hours later, Mr Stein, was escorted into an ambulance and treated for hypothermia. Police are also cautioning him for public nudity.

Journal of Imaginary Sciences Vol 6 (2009),

Ben Stein saved by Science!

The actor, Ben Stein, who is known for his out-spoken views against science, had life-saving surgery yesterday as it was revealed he had suffered from appendicitis.

Ben Stein had the surgery late last night as he was rushed to hospital in Beverly Hills complaining of bad stomach pains. There, doctors found that his appendix was inflamed and close to bursting. As a result, he was immediately operated on in a routine surgical procedure which is carried out regularly. The surgery was hailed a success and Ben Stein is currently recovering quietly in hospital.

Ben Stein is noted for his out-spoken view against the influence of science in society, stating that “science leads you to killing people” on an interview with Paul Crouch Jr for Trinity Broadcasting Network. Despite this, his wife, Alexandra Denman expressed her and her husband’s gratitude for the work of the doctors and surgeons who successfully treated Ben Stein’s problem. Ben Stein was also reported to have said he felt like he maybe had made a mistake with the interview for Trinity Broadcasting Network.

Whilst this is certainly an ironic situation, this case certainly highlights that no matter whether people disagree with scientific ideas such as Evolution and the Big Bang, science is a major, life-saving part of people’s lives.