Sunday, 26 April 2009

Stars hoax Astrologers

Journal of Imaginary Sciences, Vol 9, (2009),

Stars hoax astrologers

The predictive science of astrology was shocked today as star-readers discovered obscenities written in the night sky. As star-gazers looked into the night sky, they discovered that the words “Fuck you Astrologers” written plainly across the sky.

“We’re baffled” stated Mystic Meg, expressing her opinion. “We’re still trying to find an explanation for it. Currently one person has suggested that it is fuck your astrologers and that people will be meeting tall dark astrologers and engaging in sexual relations with them.”

When questioned about whether this states that the stars might not care about the lives of people thousands of light years away, Meg replied,
“I think the fact we have this message from the stars indicates their deep concern with us and that they are trying to encourage us to listen to them with their suggestions on how to improve your sexual relations.”

Whilst this may be a controversial message from the stars it may indeed be admitted that there is no harm carrying out the wishes of the stars. Indeed, we found out that Meg had a very comfy bed.

As this is being sent to press, another message has appeared in the stars. Whilst it is confusing, reports seem to suggest it spells the words “Fucking Idiots”.

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